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Summing things up again:
I went though a major depression over the Christmas holidays and I am still going through it.
I took time off work and spent time in the hospital. I am just starting to feel ok again, though today is rather black.
When I was sinking further and further into my depression, I was lashing out at every body. I feel terrible about it. I am not sure how to repair my friendships now.
I think I need to hear that people love me.